Week 45

One year now! :) Wow! I made it that far. But I have 6 months more to run. I have so much to be grateful for and much more for me to do and become. I love my time here... I think I will be transferred soon. I can feel it coming up. I feel like it's time. So a couple more weeks and I will probably be in a new area. I'm not sure what will happen to me but I have faith that the Lord has a plan for me here.

Our 5 days of isolation was honestly a great break, and so needed. But at the same time, it did affect us getting back to the work. We felt a little weird at church because we felt like we missed out on a lot that happened--even tho we hadn't really missed anything. We're just not used to that kind of down time. Anyways, it's great to be back into the normal schedule. I know exactly what you mean with what you said about the blessings...We're blessed when we don't even know we are. I guess I must be philosophical, too, then. Another thing I always wonder is if I will miss out on blessings I could have received. But the thing is, the only way for that to happen is if we are not obedient to the commandments of God.

THE VAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOO!! Just kidding. My parents got rid of the family van! It's OK--- I'm glad if it can bless another family! :) I am like dad, very sentimental. There are a lot of memories in that car. I'll miss the air con, and the nice CD player -- I used that a lot. Also the many trips and such we had in it. Lots of good memories. But I will mostly never forget driving it to all my jobs hahaha....

I'm glad the temple was a nice experience. I miss it a lot. One thing I'm looking forward to is going with you and dad when I get home. That will be a nice thing for me. 

So now that I am one year in the mission, I've been feeling a little bit anxious about my plan after. I am still focused here and want to be as focused as I can and give it my all till the end, but I also want to start making a plan for myself. I've heard of some sister missionaries in my mission doing that when they hit their one year, they start making plans, and I got thinking that I would need to be applying for school in the next few months if I want to be ready? I'm not sure... honestly, I feel the time is not yet for me to worry, but I have to admit lately I am starting to feel the need to worry a little bit more than I had before about myself after my mission... I am so glad you and dad will be there to help me and adjust because I know I will have a hard time... I can feel it. Anyways, it's just been on my mind. I really have no idea what to do, but I have faith in the Lord that if I am faithful in giving my all, He will help me in the next part of the plan.

SO... this week.

We taught Primary!!! It was so fun :) I loved it. We taught the 4-7 year olds. Their cute little faces watching me speak tagalog to them was so great. We taught "I can be Kind to Others" and had them sing and write on paper. I loved it!!! It was great to teach such a simple lesson on kindness.

Speaking of that.... We have some new investigators: the Jose family! It's so great to teach and ENTIRE family. Ah that's the best, since our message is about families being together forever. I would love a completed family. 

News on our great friend and investigator: 

His girlfriend doesn't want us to come back to teach him. She kept making loud noise during our lesson, and trying to distract us. She thinks it's a waste of time, and on our way out the door she says, "Don't come back here anymore. I don't like it." In a very, very raised voice... Sister Dadivas, me, and a relief society counselor are standing there stiff... we literally don't know what to say and we literally can't move. We don't say anything, and just leave. As I turn to close the door behind me, she takes it and slams it shut. TALK ABOUT REJECTION! Honestly, I'm super sad. I can't express how much I really grew to love this great person and how strongly I felt the spirit in every lesson, how happy I was to see him every Saturday and Sunday, and the possibility of reactivation with his girlfriend.  :(  wah. I'm so sad. 

Along with that sad experience, we had a trying experience with Alex. He's been having some trials in preparation for his baptism and a thought came to me yesterday at a scripture, one of my favorites from my mission: Helaman 5:12. I remember one lesson I felt the prompting very strongly to share this scripture. At first it was a little weird because it wasn't really on topic at all, but I felt the spirit and followed it. Since that first lesson, I've shared it in a couple other lessons just to remind him of it and all of a sudden it all made sense to me. The Lord had me share that because He KNEW the trials that Alex would be facing in preparation for his baptism. The trials he is experiencing are very difficult. But I have a feeling that he will reflect on those words in Helaman 5:12.

LESSON?

Follow the spirit, especially when you feel it strongly even if you feel nervous to share it. One of my favorite quotes by President Thomas S. Monson says, "I always want the Lord to know that if He ever needs and errand run, Tom Monson will run that errand for Him." I love that!!! I reflect on that a lot lately and think to myself, how can I do what President Monson does and be an 'errand runner' for the Lord. I know that I've had experiences in doing so here in my mission, and I'm thankful for those chances.

As I reflect on my year here in the Philippines, as a missionary, I am grateful for all the challenges and trials I have faced. Things I never thought I could overcome, I am overcoming, and the person I never thought I could be is becoming part of me. I know the Atonement is real for everything. I feel the Lord's love for me in the smallest of things that happen every day.

Anyways, there's always so much to say and tell. There's always so much I am feeling and I'm hard to writing in my feelings sometimes...... did I really just say 'hard to writing'?!!!!!!!!!! I am FORGETTING ENGLISH! haha What I meant: I am not a very good writer. Sheesh. 

I love you all so much. I'm sure it's hard to get back into work and school, trust me I know how that feels! Just do your best and the blessings are already there. Thanks for all your support in everything. I couldn't do it without you. Heavenly Father knows me and has given me little tender mercies in my day. Even though it's hard I am receiving so many things and little bits of help. I know Heavenly Father is watching me all the time. Have a great week, and let me know about the start of school! :) You can do it!!!!!! Love you. :)

xoxo,

Sister Seastrand